Worry and Imagination

Collage image of different materials

I wake up some nights and start to worry. Anxiety and fear begin to grip me. Sometimes, I lie in bed, frozen in loops of thought, possessed by these patterns and energies.

Children sometimes have nightmares. For me, it was the Big Bad Wolf. I had recurring dreams that he was coming to get me.

For example, I love to make collages. I love to work with my hands and make things.

This weekend was National Collage Day—or something like that.

Online, I noticed there were dozens of collage classes and workshops. And part of me was like: WEEEEEE! I’m going to sign up for that and take collage classes and make a collage and post it online and be like: YES! COLLAGE DAY! WOO!

But what also coincided with Collage Day was work, a really dirty house, my mom coming for brunch on Sunday, dog-walking, and all the responsibilities I have.

Let me tell you what took last place: collage-making. Five days later, I still hadn’t made a single one.

Worry and Fear Are the Dark Energies of Imagination

Worry and fear are destructive forces. They exhaust me, generate negative energy, and when I can’t contain them, they spill out into my relationships.

What happened on Tuesday morning? I woke up at 4 a.m.—and I worried. I worried about bills. I worried about my children. My anxiety froze me. I couldn’t get out of bed; I was too tired. Eventually, I fell back asleep, and when I did finally wake up a few hours later, I was exhausted, still wracked by fear.

For hours afterward, I couldn’t shake it. I was grumpy, anxious, and difficult.

After some self-care and reflection, I realized the root of it: I wasn’t getting my needs met. This is an old story for me. Whether it’s work, housework, or taking care of others, it’s pretty normal for me to put other people’s needs before my own.

But at the heart of it is this: I wasn’t being creative.

And when I don’t exercise my creativity or pay attention to my artistic urges, that energy still needs to go somewhere. It starts to come out sideways—in fearful thoughts and anxiety.

As a child, I used to dream about the Big Bad Wolf. He’d come out of my closet and try to drag me into his lair. I’d wake in the middle of the night and run into my mother’s room.

The Big Bad Wolf isn’t what I fear now. Today, it’s bills. It’s being able to pay for things. It’s providing for my family. Taking care of myself is one thing—we all need to exercise, eat well, and work—but for me, I also need an outlet for creativity. I need a space to connect with this part of me, this life-force energy, and allow it to express itself through me.

Collage image of a wolf, a temple and a sacred staff. The temple is upon a dial graphic, the dial is a half circle and two different textures are under the ends of the half circle.

Imagination Needs to Be Focused

Imagination can be a creative or destructive force.

I need to channel this creative energy into my life to help offset the negative expressions of imagination. Because when I don’t, I begin to worry and become overwhelmed by anxiety.

I know this about myself: If I don’t express myself creatively, this is what happens.

This energy needs expression, and I must allow it to move through me in positive and focused ways.

So what am I going to do about it?

I decide.

I decide whether I will worry or channel that energy into creativity and progress.

Sometimes it’s difficult. The worry and fear seem to possess me. But being able to redirect this energy into creative outlets is key.

That decision is essential.

If being a good father, a productive worker, and a happy person is deeply tied to being creative—then creativity must be prioritized. It must be an essential part of my being, meaning it must be actively nurtured.

I repressed my creative urge.

And sometimes that has to happen—scheduling, life, logistics. But if I know I’m going to melt down if I don’t address it, I have to look at things differently.

Because that creative energy will come out.

If it doesn’t come out as collage, it’s going to come out as worry and fear.

Worry and fear are creative energies. They fill my head with all the scenarios of what can go wrong. What’s going to happen if this terrible thing happens?

At its root, this is an act of imagination.

What If I Used My Imagination for Good?

What if I actively imagined the best-case scenario?

Can I decide to do that?

Can I channel this energy into positive dreams of the best possible outcome?

Can I take the time to consciously visualize the dreams happening—the money coming in, the clients, the students, the vacations, the deals?

Can I see the wonderful life I’ll be living—the beautiful places I’ll visit and the vibrant health I’ll enjoy?

What does the best-case scenario look like to you?